Overheard at the golf shop

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Date: 19 Feb 2007 23:53:09
From: Chris Sorenson
Subject: Overheard at the golf shop

True story:

Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
Customer: "I'm not sure..."
Store guy: "Whyzat?"
Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
it..."

Date: 20 Feb 2007 18:39:25
From: annika1980
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On Feb 20, 3:46 pm, John van der Pflum >
> I dunno. I've played with Annika enough times to see his putting. Six
> feet might be considered dead for him.

Or dead for whoever I'm playin.
Like I told R&B one time ... we were playing a par-3 at Trophy Club
and I was feeling even more cocky than normal (if you can believe
that). If memory serves I think Da Ringer was there, too.
Anyways, the pin was back left and I said, "No prob for the old
draw." I hit it about 8-feet from the hole, and Randy says, "Yeah,
but you still gotta make the putt."

I explained, "There are 3 things you can count on in this world...
Death, Taxes, and Annika from 8-feet."

Date: 21 Feb 2007 06:18:58
From: Sparky
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On 20-Feb-2007, "annika1980" <annika1980@aol.com > wrote:

> On Feb 20, 3:46 pm, John van der Pflum >
> > I dunno. I've played with Annika enough times to see his putting. Six
> > feet might be considered dead for him.
>
> Or dead for whoever I'm playin.
> Like I told R&B one time ... we were playing a par-3 at Trophy Club
> and I was feeling even more cocky than normal (if you can believe
> that). If memory serves I think Da Ringer was there, too.
> Anyways, the pin was back left and I said, "No prob for the old
> draw." I hit it about 8-feet from the hole, and Randy says, "Yeah,
> but you still gotta make the putt."
>
> I explained, "There are 3 things you can count on in this world...
> Death, Taxes, and Annika from 8-feet."

I believe I was there for that one, along with a certain cheeseburger at
the turn... :-)

me

Date: 20 Feb 2007 18:32:58
From: annika1980
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On Feb 20, 3:16 pm, Howard Brazee <how...@brazee.net > wrote:
> On 20 Feb 2007 06:54:53 -0800, "annika1980" <annika1...@aol.com>
> wrote:
>
> > Everybody got a good howl at my expense until I hit it stoney, 6 feet pin-high.
>
> What does "stoney" mean here?

>From 190 it means "6 feet, pin-high."

And yes, there was much arm raising and fist pumping when I made the
birdie putt, just to rub it in to the fools watching back on the tee.
And no, he didn't knock his 9-iron on the green, let alone stoney.

Another time this long-hittin Bill character (I'll call him Bill
because that is his name) was playing with Mikey and another guy
called Tapedeck (long story). Anyway, they are playing a 165-yard
par-3 into a pretty good wind. Mikey thinks he can get there by
busting a 5-iron. He pures it, but the ball gets up in the wind and
falls well short.
Tapedeck doesn't believe shit stinks so he also takes out a 5-iron and
really rips it, but his ball gets knocked down short of the green as
well.

Ol' Bill, who REALLY doesn't believe shit stinks says, "I think I can
get there with a 9-iron."

Mikey just smiles and shakes his head.
Tapedeck tries to be polite and says, "Now I'm not sayin you can't get
there with a 9. I'm just sayin that you can't get there with a 9
TODAY."

[There's a lesson about course management buried in all that bullshit
somewhere.]

Date: 21 Feb 2007 08:13:46
From: Howard Brazee
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On 20 Feb 2007 18:32:58 -0800, "annika1980" <annika1980@aol.com >
wrote:

>Mikey just smiles and shakes his head.
>Tapedeck tries to be polite and says, "Now I'm not sayin you can't get
>there with a 9. I'm just sayin that you can't get there with a 9
>TODAY."

Sort of like the sudden death example we saw on TV Sunday with the
weekend's two best.

Date: 20 Feb 2007 12:46:51
From: cja
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On Feb 20, 3:37 pm, "cja" <c...@excite.com > wrote:
> On Feb 20, 3:16 pm, Howard Brazee <how...@brazee.net> wrote:> On 20 Feb 2007 06:54:53 -0800, "annika1980" <annika1...@aol.com>
> > wrote:
>
> > > Everybody got a good howl at my expense until I hit it stoney, 6 feet pin-high.
>
> > What does "stoney" mean here?
>
> Stone dead. Or as Feherty might say: stone motherless dead. I.e.,
> close. Although, I'm not sure 6 ft. qualifies. I'd want it 3 ft. or
> less before I considered it dead.
>
> - cja
>
Instead of just "close", I probably should have said that "stone dead"
means it's so close you can't miss the putt. Maybe "stoney" is a
little less emphatic. If I stuck my shot to 6 ft. pin-high I might say
I hit it stiff.

Date: 20 Feb 2007 20:52:48
From: Bobby Knight
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On 20 Feb 2007 12:46:51 -0800, "cja" <cja@excite.com > wrote:

>On Feb 20, 3:37 pm, "cja" <c...@excite.com> wrote:
>> On Feb 20, 3:16 pm, Howard Brazee <how...@brazee.net> wrote:> On 20 Feb 2007 06:54:53 -0800, "annika1980" <annika1...@aol.com>
>> > wrote:
>>
>> > > Everybody got a good howl at my expense until I hit it stoney, 6 feet pin-high.
>>
>> > What does "stoney" mean here?
>>
>> Stone dead. Or as Feherty might say: stone motherless dead. I.e.,
>> close. Although, I'm not sure 6 ft. qualifies. I'd want it 3 ft. or
>> less before I considered it dead.
>>
>> - cja
>>
>Instead of just "close", I probably should have said that "stone dead"
>means it's so close you can't miss the putt. Maybe "stoney" is a
>little less emphatic. If I stuck my shot to 6 ft. pin-high I might say
>I hit it stiff.
>
You also have to figure in that Bret was pissed off at the guy for the
rek on the tee. He's really be grinding on that putt. :-)
___,
\o

Date: 20 Feb 2007 12:37:14
From: cja
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

Date: 20 Feb 2007 20:50:31
From: Bobby Knight
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On 20 Feb 2007 12:37:14 -0800, "cja" <cja@excite.com > wrote:

>On Feb 20, 3:16 pm, Howard Brazee <how...@brazee.net> wrote:
>> On 20 Feb 2007 06:54:53 -0800, "annika1980" <annika1...@aol.com>
>> wrote:
>>
>> > Everybody got a good howl at my expense until I hit it stoney, 6 feet pin-high.
>>
>> What does "stoney" mean here?
>>
>Stone dead. Or as Feherty might say: stone motherless dead. I.e.,
>close. Although, I'm not sure 6 ft. qualifies. I'd want it 3 ft. or
>less before I considered it dead.
>
> - cja

Bret is a putter!!! It was stoney.
___,
\o

Date: 20 Feb 2007 15:46:30
From: John van der Pflum
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

Date: 20 Feb 2007 11:20:38
From: Mister Hand
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On Feb 20, 9:54 am, "annika1980" <annika1...@aol.com > wrote:
> On Feb 20, 12:53 am, Chris Sorenson <cso...@isd.net> wrote:
>
> > True story:
>
> > Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
> > Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
> > Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
> > Customer: "I'm not sure..."
> > Store guy: "Whyzat?"
> > Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
> > it..."
>
> Reminds me of a guy who I used to play with who would hood his irons
> so fiercely he'd de-loft them to where his 9-iron was effectively
> about a 5-iron. He loved to brag about how far he hit his irons.
>
> One time he was about 220 out waiting for the green to clear and he
> was holding his 5-iron. Old Sarge asked him, "Damn Bill, if you can
> hit a 5-iron 220 how far can you hit a 1-iron?
>
> Bill answered in all sincerity, "I don't know. For some reason I have
> trouble with irons longer than the 5-iron."
>
> And I can't think about that guy without remembering this story I've
> told before. We were the first team off in the Saturday morning low-
> ball and most of the players had gathered around the par-3 10th hole
> at Pungent Municipal to watch us hit. The hole was playing about 190
> so I approached the tee with my Palmer Peerless 4-wood (they actually
> were made of wood back in those days). Old Bill can't resist it and
> starts flapping his gums, "Boy, you guys are in trouble. Your captain
> has already got the furniture out!" Everybody got a good howl at my
> expense until I hit it stoney, 6 feet pin-high.
>
> "Knock your damn 9-iron inside of that!" I told him as I walked off.

He plays in my group now. Hits his wedge where I'm using a five-iron
and shoots twenty strokes over me (unless there's no one there to
confirm, then he's in the low 90's, go figure).

Date: 20 Feb 2007 10:33:40
From: JJVP
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On Feb 19, 11:53 pm, Chris Sorenson <cso...@isd.net > wrote:
> True story:
>
> Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
> Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
> Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
> Customer: "I'm not sure..."
> Store guy: "Whyzat?"
> Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
> it..."

Hey, if Phil Mickelson can hit an 8 iron 230
yrds.............uhmmm....... wait, he can't. Never mind.

JJVP

Date: 20 Feb 2007 07:36:49
From: Ben.
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On Feb 20, 8:54 am, "annika1980" <annika1...@aol.com > wrote:
> On Feb 20, 12:53 am, Chris Sorenson <cso...@isd.net> wrote:
>
> > True story:
>
> > Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
> > Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
> > Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
> > Customer: "I'm not sure..."
> > Store guy: "Whyzat?"
> > Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
> > it..."
>
> Reminds me of a guy who I used to play with who would hood his irons
> so fiercely he'd de-loft them to where his 9-iron was effectively
> about a 5-iron. He loved to brag about how far he hit his irons.
>
> One time he was about 220 out waiting for the green to clear and he
> was holding his 5-iron. Old Sarge asked him, "Damn Bill, if you can
> hit a 5-iron 220 how far can you hit a 1-iron?
>
> Bill answered in all sincerity, "I don't know. For some reason I have
> trouble with irons longer than the 5-iron."

Interesting story, though seems like I've heard it before. Oh yeah,
in the paragraph just above your's...

Date: 20 Feb 2007 15:46:35
From: Bobby Knight
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On 20 Feb 2007 07:36:49 -0800, "Ben." <kombi45@yahoo.com > wrote:

>On Feb 20, 8:54 am, "annika1980" <annika1...@aol.com> wrote:
>> On Feb 20, 12:53 am, Chris Sorenson <cso...@isd.net> wrote:
>>
>> > True story:
>>
>> > Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
>> > Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
>> > Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
>> > Customer: "I'm not sure..."
>> > Store guy: "Whyzat?"
>> > Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
>> > it..."
>>
>> Reminds me of a guy who I used to play with who would hood his irons
>> so fiercely he'd de-loft them to where his 9-iron was effectively
>> about a 5-iron. He loved to brag about how far he hit his irons.
>>
>> One time he was about 220 out waiting for the green to clear and he
>> was holding his 5-iron. Old Sarge asked him, "Damn Bill, if you can
>> hit a 5-iron 220 how far can you hit a 1-iron?
>>
>> Bill answered in all sincerity, "I don't know. For some reason I have
>> trouble with irons longer than the 5-iron."
>
>Interesting story, though seems like I've heard it before. Oh yeah,
>in the paragraph just above your's...

Two completely different stories. Having trouble concentrating Ben?
--
___,
\o

Date: 20 Feb 2007 19:08:20
From: BAR
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

Bobby Knight wrote:
> On 20 Feb 2007 07:36:49 -0800, "Ben." <kombi45@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
>> On Feb 20, 8:54 am, "annika1980" <annika1...@aol.com> wrote:
>>> On Feb 20, 12:53 am, Chris Sorenson <cso...@isd.net> wrote:
>>>
>>>> True story:
>>>> Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
>>>> Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
>>>> Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
>>>> Customer: "I'm not sure..."
>>>> Store guy: "Whyzat?"
>>>> Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
>>>> it..."
>>> Reminds me of a guy who I used to play with who would hood his irons
>>> so fiercely he'd de-loft them to where his 9-iron was effectively
>>> about a 5-iron. He loved to brag about how far he hit his irons.
>>>
>>> One time he was about 220 out waiting for the green to clear and he
>>> was holding his 5-iron. Old Sarge asked him, "Damn Bill, if you can
>>> hit a 5-iron 220 how far can you hit a 1-iron?
>>>
>>> Bill answered in all sincerity, "I don't know. For some reason I have
>>> trouble with irons longer than the 5-iron."
>> Interesting story, though seems like I've heard it before. Oh yeah,
>> in the paragraph just above your's...
>
> Two completely different stories. Having trouble concentrating Ben?

No, just dull droning text that runs on and on making it hard to
distinguish where one stops and the other starts.

Date: 20 Feb 2007 06:54:53
From: annika1980
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On Feb 20, 12:53 am, Chris Sorenson <cso...@isd.net > wrote:
> True story:
>
> Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
> Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
> Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
> Customer: "I'm not sure..."
> Store guy: "Whyzat?"
> Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
> it..."

Reminds me of a guy who I used to play with who would hood his irons
so fiercely he'd de-loft them to where his 9-iron was effectively
about a 5-iron. He loved to brag about how far he hit his irons.

One time he was about 220 out waiting for the green to clear and he
was holding his 5-iron. Old Sarge asked him, "Damn Bill, if you can
hit a 5-iron 220 how far can you hit a 1-iron?

Bill answered in all sincerity, "I don't know. For some reason I have
trouble with irons longer than the 5-iron."

And I can't think about that guy without remembering this story I've
told before. We were the first team off in the Saturday morning low-
ball and most of the players had gathered around the par-3 10th hole
at Pungent Municipal to watch us hit. The hole was playing about 190
so I approached the tee with my Palmer Peerless 4-wood (they actually
were made of wood back in those days). Old Bill can't resist it and
starts flapping his gums, "Boy, you guys are in trouble. Your captain
has already got the furniture out!" Everybody got a good howl at my
expense until I hit it stoney, 6 feet pin-high.

"Knock your damn 9-iron inside of that!" I told him as I walked off.

Date: 20 Feb 2007 13:16:02
From: Howard Brazee
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On 20 Feb 2007 06:54:53 -0800, "annika1980" <annika1980@aol.com >
wrote:

> Everybody got a good howl at my expense until I hit it stoney, 6 feet pin-high.

What does "stoney" mean here?

Date: 20 Feb 2007 20:06:06
From: Michel Oui
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

annika1980 wrote:
> On Feb 20, 12:53 am, Chris Sorenson <cso...@isd.net> wrote:
>> True story:
>>
>> Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
>> Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
>> Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
>> Customer: "I'm not sure..."
>> Store guy: "Whyzat?"
>> Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
>> it..."
>
> Reminds me of a guy who I used to play with who would hood his irons
> so fiercely he'd de-loft them to where his 9-iron was effectively
> about a 5-iron. He loved to brag about how far he hit his irons.
>
> One time he was about 220 out waiting for the green to clear and he
> was holding his 5-iron. Old Sarge asked him, "Damn Bill, if you can
> hit a 5-iron 220 how far can you hit a 1-iron?
>
> Bill answered in all sincerity, "I don't know. For some reason I have
> trouble with irons longer than the 5-iron."
>
> And I can't think about that guy without remembering this story I've
> told before. We were the first team off in the Saturday morning low-
> ball and most of the players had gathered around the par-3 10th hole
> at Pungent Municipal to watch us hit. The hole was playing about 190
> so I approached the tee with my Palmer Peerless 4-wood (they actually
> were made of wood back in those days). Old Bill can't resist it and
> starts flapping his gums, "Boy, you guys are in trouble. Your captain
> has already got the furniture out!" Everybody got a good howl at my
> expense until I hit it stoney, 6 feet pin-high.
>
> "Knock your damn 9-iron inside of that!" I told him as I walked off.

Don't leave us hanging. Did he or didn't he knock his 9-iron inside
your shot?

Date: 20 Feb 2007 15:25:42
From: Bobby Knight
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On 20 Feb 2007 06:54:53 -0800, "annika1980" <annika1980@aol.com >
wrote:

>On Feb 20, 12:53 am, Chris Sorenson <cso...@isd.net> wrote:
>> True story:
>>
>> Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
>> Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
>> Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
>> Customer: "I'm not sure..."
>> Store guy: "Whyzat?"
>> Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
>> it..."
>
>Reminds me of a guy who I used to play with who would hood his irons
>so fiercely he'd de-loft them to where his 9-iron was effectively
>about a 5-iron. He loved to brag about how far he hit his irons.
>
>One time he was about 220 out waiting for the green to clear and he
>was holding his 5-iron. Old Sarge asked him, "Damn Bill, if you can
>hit a 5-iron 220 how far can you hit a 1-iron?
>
>Bill answered in all sincerity, "I don't know. For some reason I have
>trouble with irons longer than the 5-iron."
<clip >
Our group, in a shotgun start tournament, started on our 9th hole,
about 500yd par 5, which I bogied. This was some time back, when I
had a decent long game. When we finished the round on 8, I made the
rek that I could've bogied 9 using only a wedge. Three $20 bets
rang out. Well, I could hood that wedge and get 120-130 out of it,
that was four shots to the green, and two putts. No problem. Plus,
one of the guys gave me a brand new Rockflite, "just to give you some
more yardage".

I teed the ball up and promptly hooked the wedge OB. Took me ten
minutes to get those guys off the ground and in the carts.

--
___,
\o

Date: 20 Feb 2007 17:13:02
From: Ezran
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

On Mon, 19 Feb 2007 23:53:09 -0600, Chris Sorenson <csoren@isd.net >
wrote:

>True story:
>
>Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
>Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
>Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
>Customer: "I'm not sure..."
>Store guy: "Whyzat?"
>Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
>it..."

lol. Not too difficult to find my ball after a 2 iron shot. Should be
about 20 yards ahead...

Date: 20 Feb 2007 23:12:58
From: Chris Sorenson
Subject: Re: Overheard at the golf shop

Ezran wrote:
> On Mon, 19 Feb 2007 23:53:09 -0600, Chris Sorenson <csoren@isd.net>
> wrote:
>
>
>>True story:
>>
>>Store guy: "How far do you hit your long irons?"
>>Customer: "I can hit the 5 almost 200 sometimes..."
>>Store guy: "The five's a middle iron, how far can you hit a two?"
>>Customer: "I'm not sure..."
>>Store guy: "Whyzat?"
>>Customer: "Well, to know how far it went you have to be able to find
>>it..."
>
>
> lol. Not too difficult to find my ball after a 2 iron shot. Should be
> about 20 yards ahead...
>

Same. 'Cept mine's more like 20 feet. Or 20 inches...