golf-forums.net
Promoting golf discussion.

Main
Date: 14 Apr 2007 15:50:02
From: The_Professor
Subject: Got another one!
Was hitting a few balls on the range for the first time in ages.
Another resolution I cannot keep; STAY OFF THE RANGE!!! Ah well. I was
trying to just swing easy; never hard. More or less did it, but it
still screwed up my swing a bit, especially the timing. Didn't matter
though.

Start talking to some guy. He asks me what my handicap is. I tell him
I don't waste my time with thatr rubbish anymore, but would probably
be where it's always been, 15 or so. So he tells me he's a single
digit handicapper and launches into the usual tirade of what I need to
to do get better. I told him I'm just happy to play...and am heading
out in a bit, and would he like to join me? He says nah...so I head to
the putting green and putt a bit. I'm trying low spinning chips, which
I am not good at, but they are good shots, and required in many cases,
at least if you want to use whatever skill you have to make a good
shot when you attempt a shot, so well worth working on. Maybe not
futilly for 20 years! The guy comes over to the green. There are a
bunch of newbie kids teeing off. Three groups of them. It's gonna be
slow! The guy tries a few chips and decides to join me. He throws in a
few putting tips, which I listen to OK, but truth be told, he is not
as good a putter as I am.

So we tee off. I ask him how many holes he plans to play. He says
nine. I ask him if he wants to play for a buck. He says he won't give
me any strokes. I say OK. He thinks it won't be fair. I say I don't
care; I like to play for something just to keep the game *HONEST*!!! I
say I sometimes tend to pick up putts I should putt out and roll the
ball from time to time, but a buck or two on the round keeps me from
doing that. He says OK, but wants to go for a fin to make it more
interesting. I guess I'm not poor enough to see his point, and he
looked richer than me, but OK by me.

The guy hits the ball really well and sorta chips OK, but he seemed to
think the third putt is always a gimme! No way! Funny how it affected
his second putts. He outdrove me by 50 yards at least. It was
embarassing walking to the ball, but no so for me picking the ball out
of the hole. If I ever outshortgame you; you gotta be embarassed. Not
to say the greens aren't ultra tricked up, they are, but I only 3
putted twice and made a couple of putts. I was still +7 for the nine
holes, but won every hole anyway...even when he started rolling the
ball. The guy stiffed me for the fin too; like I care! Makes it all
the more satisfying.





 
Date: 15 Apr 2007 10:01:04
From: Miss Anne Thrope
Subject: Re: Got another one!
"He asks me what my handicap is..."

That's the lamest pick-up line ever.

I hope you were honest and responded, "Tiny genitals and social
ineptness."



  
Date: 15 Apr 2007 23:15:42
From: Blagovist
Subject: Re: Got another one!
Miss Anne Thrope wrote:
> "He asks me what my handicap is..."
>
> That's the lamest pick-up line ever.
>
> I hope you were honest and responded, "Tiny genitals and social
> ineptness."

PS. my best pick up line is "can I fuck your tits?"

Blago


   
Date: 15 Apr 2007 20:46:47
From: Otto
Subject: Re: Got another one!

"Blagovist" <blag@ovist.com > wrote in message
news:4622a42b_1@x-privat.org...
> PS. my best pick up line is "can I fuck your tits?"


The question to follow that one is:

Do you want the woman that says "yes" to that question?

Otto




  
Date: 15 Apr 2007 23:14:55
From: Blagovist
Subject: Re: Got another one!
Miss Anne Thrope wrote:
> "He asks me what my handicap is..."
>
> That's the lamest pick-up line ever.
>
> I hope you were honest and responded, "Tiny genitals and social
> ineptness."

LOL, another great call!


Blago


 
Date: 15 Apr 2007 04:16:43
From:
Subject: Re: Got another one!
On 15 Apr., 00:50, "The_Professor" <d...@att.net > wrote:

<snipped >
> I was still +7 for the nine
> holes, but won every hole anyway...even when he started rolling the
> ball. The guy stiffed me for the fin too; like I care! Makes it all
> the more satisfying.

If you shot +7 for the nine and won every hole, this guy was no
single digit handicapper. I actually had the reverse of this
situation on the golf course, once. I was playing at a golf course
that I used to love but no longer exists (Binks Forest, West Palm
Beach, Fl) with a buddy of mine and a single joined us on the first
tee.

The front nine, I was goofing around and trying to hit impossible
recovery shots, etc... I think I shot about a 43, but I did not care,
since we were just out to slap a ball around. Well, the single that
joined us asked if we wanted to play some skins on the back nine. I
only had a couple of dollars in my pocket, so I suggested that we play
with no carry-overs. My buddy, with whom I had played many rounds of
golf with, told me he had me covered, so we agreed.

I shot -1 on the back nine with 8 pars and 1birdie (missed a hole-in-
one again by a couple of inches :-( ). I ended up winning every hole
on the back nine. I offered to by a round of beers in the clubhouse,
but the guy just jammed some bills in my hand and left pretty pissed
off. I guess he felt I had hustled him. He never asked me what my
handicap was and was basing his chances on my play on the front nine.
I was playing to a 4 at the time.

I think that guy you were playing with probably shot an 80 once or
twice in his life and since he could hit the ball long felt that he
may be a single-digit player. Of course, your observations on the
practice green were right on the money and if you cannot putt, you
cannot score.

David




  
Date: 15 Apr 2007 18:09:00
From: Robert Hamilton
Subject: Re: Got another one!


dgold1958@yahoo.de wrote:

> On 15 Apr., 00:50, "The_Professor" <d...@att.net> wrote:
> snip..
>
> I think that guy you were playing with probably shot an 80 once or
> twice in his life and since he could hit the ball long felt that he
> may be a single-digit player. Of course, your observations on the
> practice green were right on the money and if you cannot putt, you
> cannot score.
>

The guy hits the ball really well. IMHO, he is used to hitting a GIR, being
really agressive with the par putt, and if he gets in trouble, go for the
par putt, and missing that, picks it up. Right off the bat, he hits the
first green. I miss and chip to 8 feet, miss the putt but tap in for bogie.
He was really aggressive with a 15 foot or so birdie putt, leaves a 6
footer and is aggressive again, leaves a 4 footer, and misses for a double.
I'd bet serious money that 99% of the time the guy plays he picks up the 4
footer. On 6 he was so tentative he left a 10 footer 4 feet short!
Regardless of the reason, it's about the worst putting I have ever seen.




   
Date: 15 Apr 2007 21:27:51
From: David
Subject: Re: Got another one!
On Sun, 15 Apr 2007 18:09:00 GMT, Robert Hamilton <DBID@att.net >
wrote:

>
>
>dgold1958@yahoo.de wrote:
>
>> On 15 Apr., 00:50, "The_Professor" <d...@att.net> wrote:
>> snip..
>>
>> I think that guy you were playing with probably shot an 80 once or
>> twice in his life and since he could hit the ball long felt that he
>> may be a single-digit player. Of course, your observations on the
>> practice green were right on the money and if you cannot putt, you
>> cannot score.
>>
>
>The guy hits the ball really well. IMHO, he is used to hitting a GIR, being
>really agressive with the par putt, and if he gets in trouble, go for the
>par putt, and missing that, picks it up. Right off the bat, he hits the
>first green. I miss and chip to 8 feet, miss the putt but tap in for bogie.
>He was really aggressive with a 15 foot or so birdie putt, leaves a 6
>footer and is aggressive again, leaves a 4 footer, and misses for a double.
>I'd bet serious money that 99% of the time the guy plays he picks up the 4
>footer. On 6 he was so tentative he left a 10 footer 4 feet short!
>Regardless of the reason, it's about the worst putting I have ever seen.

I wasn't trying to belittle your accomplishment, if that is how it
came off. I don't know any single-digit players who cannot chip and
putt. It would be impossible to get to a single digit without these
abilities. I do, however, know a lot of golfers who can hit the ball
well, but when they miss they are toast. These are the golfers who
only remember their career rounds, by the way. I love playing against
vanity handicappers--they are easy to take money from.

David



 
Date: 14 Apr 2007 18:53:06
From: WW
Subject: Re: Got another one!
Don't you love it when people say it's just a game? Horseshit! It's
GOLF, It's REAL. I like to win when possible. I suck.... but if I was
3 putting all the time I'de be @ Dick's sporting goods finding another
putter. Sounds like an enjoyable day.



  
Date: 15 Apr 2007 23:12:28
From: Blagovist
Subject: Re: Got another one!
WW wrote:
> Don't you love it when people say it's just a game? Horseshit! It's
> GOLF, It's REAL. I like to win when possible. I suck.... but if I was
> 3 putting all the time I'de be @ Dick's sporting goods finding another
> putter. Sounds like an enjoyable day.


Or jerking-off over some imaginary golf-bitch.

Blago


  
Date: 15 Apr 2007 02:39:19
From: Robert Hamilton
Subject: Re: Got another one!


WW wrote:

> Don't you love it when people say it's just a game? Horseshit! It's
> GOLF, It's REAL. I like to win when possible. I suck.... but if I was
> 3 putting all the time I'de be @ Dick's sporting goods finding another
> putter. Sounds like an enjoyable day.

Any day on the golf course is an enjoyable day for me. Watching this guy
"putt" was a hoot though!




 
Date: 14 Apr 2007 23:25:12
From: Howard Brazee
Subject: Re: Got another one!
On 14 Apr 2007 15:50:02 -0700, "The_Professor" <dbid@att.net > wrote:

>The guy hits the ball really well and sorta chips OK, but he seemed to
>think the third putt is always a gimme!

I didn't know single digit handicappers had third putts. I was
thinking how poorly I putted today - I had a three-putt.